Inspired by a lovely song from Lifehouse...heehee..Though not a songfic... Juju, you're a meanie! You see everyone I like as a wank! Bet if you met Migmig too you'd think he was a want...Heehehe..I wouldn't argue if you did, the little idiot.

Anyways...this was really just an exploration of Hakkai's character. I wanted to try to get into his character and all that crap so I wrote it in his POV. Might try a Sanzo POV next... Me thinking that the hardest one to do would be one of Goku...Anyways, ficcy...Not betad yet...Will read through it later once I get back home...

Title: Where I Want to Be
Part: 1/1
Author: Laree McKenzie
Fandom: Gensomaden Saiyuki
Rating: PG13
Contact: lareemackie@yahoo.com.au
Archive: https://llmackie.tripod.com/
Warnings: Shounen Ai material (Sanzo x Hakkai/Hakkai x Sanzo). This fic was brought about by listening to the song 'Breathing' by Lifehouse, one of my favorites ^__^.

Where I Want to Be

My harsh, ragged breathing slows down to its normal pace as Sanzo rolls off me without another word. As usual, I'm left with the feeling of emptiness that comes after the heated passion of our lovemaking, if you could call our frantic, hurried couplings that.

Slowly, I turned my face towards the pillow where Sanzo had rested his head only moments before and breathed in the lingering scent that had been left there. Soft and musky, with a trace of tobacco that always seemed to linger around him and the smell of the shampoo and soap that I purchased for the use of our group. I try to lose myself in that scent. Try to keep my mind off the ugly truth that it always eventually turned to.

There's no love between us. As much as I would like to fool myself into thinking that maybe, these late night sessions meant as much to him as they did me, I'm a realist.

We were thrown together by the fates out of necessity, bonded by the common burden of restoring order to our world for the sake of all. And through the course of our journey, we turned to each other out of necessity, the need to get away from everything, to forget all except the beautifully toned body pressed against you, even if only for a while.

Gojyo has such an appropriate term for it. It's an ugly and crass term, but it effectively describes my pseudo relationship with the monk. That's what Sanzo and I were: Fuck Buddies.

I cringe even as I think of it, but yes, it was appropriate. After all, what went on between us was nothing more than a bastardization of what should have been a beautiful act of love between two people who cared deeply for each other, at least that's what I've always been taught.

But hey, if it allows you to forget about what a dire situation you were in for a while, why not? The only things that seem to bring me comfort these days are my friendship with the three men who were all in it with me, and Sanzo. I wasn't about to give him up, no matter how confused and awkward I felt after each of our encounters.

I sit myself up, resting my back against the headboard of the bed, unsure of what to do with myself. I always was. Sanzo makes no indication of having noticed my movement as I shifted slightly to place myself more comfortably.

He's beautiful. I love watching him at these times, because I get to see Sanzo at his best. His face is smooth and free of the usual scowl or somber expression, cheeks slightly flushed from his exertion. The moonlight streaming in through the nearby window falls upon him and picks out the golden highlights of his hair. His eyes are closed and his chest rises and falls in a steady rhythm, yet I know that he's not asleep yet. He's merely composing himself. It was part of the routine.

He was so lovely, indescribably lovely, and I could never have him. Not in the way that I wanted, not completely. I wish that I could just get my stupid, stubborn heart to understand that, but it refused to cooperate.

I smile down at my clasped hands and break the silence with the sound of my voice: "Ne, Sanzo. Before we leave this village tomorrow morning, I think I should go and stock up on supplies. We're running a little low on-"

He opens one amethyst eye and fixes it upon me. He has the strangest eyes I've ever come across on a person. I've never seen anything like them or ever will again, I think. They, just like the rest of Sanzo, are one of a kind. They're part of what makes him unique. "Do whatever you like."

I nod, not at all put out by his brusqueness. He's always like that after all. You get used to it after a while. I even find it comforting, knowing that the world around me may change at any given time, but Sanzo will remain the same as he always was. He couldn't even act a little less aloof around the man that he'd been sleeping with every night for the last couple of months, but then that was Genjo Sanzo for you. He perceived any sort of affection towards an individual to be a weakness. In a way, I guess he was right.

The more deeply you love someone, the harder the fall that you're setting yourself up for. I learned that through my experience with Kanan, or I should have. But human or youkai, and I'd been both, just weren't made to be solitary creatures. They search for comfort within others, no matter how afraid they are of being hurt again.

"Thank you, Sanzo." I doggedly press on with the conversation in spite of the fact that I knew that it would be rather one sided, he never contributed much and I just never know when to give up, I guess. I tell him about my planned route for the next day, about Gojyo and the slight brawl that he'd been in that evening over some girl, how I'd had to drag Goku away from the inn kitchens where he'd been begging for food, about all the chores that I needed to get done and he never once says anything, never once made a sound, but at least he's not telling me to shut up. For some reason, he almost never does. He just lets me go on and on, as I like about the most trivial things. Maybe the sound of my voice quiets him. Who knows? I certainly find listening to him speaking very comforting.

But he doesn't even make any indication whatsoever that he's listening. I don't mind that much. I'd like more from him, maybe, but I was happy for what little I could get out of him. I've never been particularly demanding. I guess that's both a good thing and a bad thing, and it would explain how I could bear this sort of arrangement.

I slip back into silence and immerse myself in my thoughts, my eyes lingering upon my companion's face.

He's arrogant, he's selfish, and cold, short tempered and everything that you would least expect a supposedly holy man to be. He was everything that I had never known I particularly wanted in a companion and surprisingly enough, he was the one that had somehow broken through the defenses that I'd put around myself after Kanan's death. He was the one that made his way into my heart, which puzzled me. I was usually more drawn towards gentle, quiet people who needed me.

You certainly wouldn't describe Sanzo as gentle and quiet and he'd made it quite clear that he thought he didn't need me, or anyone else for that matter, but he made me feel. He caused a turmoil of emotions within me; confusion, frustration, love and countless of others that I couldn't even begin to grasp all churning inside me until I was hard pressed to keep my usual, amiable smile upon my face.

He enthralled me; he had me completely under his spell. The prospect of being able to break through Sanzo's own barriers excited me, but that was an impossible fantasy of mine. It's horribly romantic to think of being the one to bring the cold, callous person out of his shell, and also horribly difficult to actually accomplish.

I didn't think I'd be able to do that. I didn't think Sanzo would ever allow me to get close enough to try.

I don't know if I even wanted to try, not after my horrible track record when it comes to matters concerning the heart. I'm a coward. I didn't want to spoil things. If this was really the best that I could get out of him, this casual relationship that went no deeper than guilt free sex, then so be it.

Any other normal man would have been thrilled by the arrangement. No commitment, just a warm body beside you every night. "Maybe Gojyo would be better suited to you, ne, Sanzo?" I smile at the thought. Those two would have killed each other, but at least Gojyo would have been happier than I was. He saw nothing wrong with arrangements such as ours.

"Are you insulting my intelligence? Sticking me with that idiot half-breed?" I jump slightly, startled by the sudden sound of his voice. I really hadn't meant to speak aloud. Sanzo sits up also, fumbles around on the bedside table for his packet of cigarettes and lights up, his eyes trained upon me the whole time.

"Gojyo is a lot smarter that you think he is. He's not book smart, but he knows his way around things and that's just as good, don't you think, Sanzo? Besides, this doesn't really require much intelligence, don't you agree?" I'd meant that as a lighthearted comment but when it came out, even I could sense the tinge of bitterness in my usually pleasant and cheerful tone.

Just when I'd decided that it would be unwise to press the matter, here I was doing just that. I was considered the levelheaded and smart one of the group, and then I go ahead and do something this phenomenally stupid and embarrassing, sulking like a wronged woman.

There's silence. I don't dare look at Sanzo's face but his breathing seems to have sped up from agitation and the cigarette butt was crushed abruptly against the ashtray. The tension between us was so palpable that I was tempted to just jump out of bed, gather my things and retreat to my own room but I knew that that would only make things worse.

Since I'd already set things into motion, we might as well talk through this right now.

"I haven't been forcing myself on you." He was angry, I could tell. I risked a glance at him, his jaw is set, his eyes are flashing angrily and his fists are clenched tightly together, fingernails digging into his palm. I'd never seen him like this before. He got angry a lot with Gojyo or Goku, but he was never this intense. "If you don't want this, then say so. Don't feel obliged to cater to me like you do everyone else just because I got stuck with the job as the leader for you lot."

"Do you really think I'd allow you to take advantage of me if I didn't want it?" I was much stronger than I appeared to be. Sanzo and I having fought side by side on numerous occasions before should have realized that if anyone had tried anything on me that I didn't want, they'd end up severely punished, no matter who they were.

"Damn you, Hakkai." He'd never cursed me before. Tempers were flaring dangerously. I can control my own very well but the same couldn't be said for Sanzo. He was a passionate man by nature and was liable to get out of control when in the heat of anger. "No one can ever tell what you want or don't want. You talk in riddles, never just coming out with something outright. You hide behind that idiotic smile and you have this way of sounding unbearably holy sometimes. Most of the time, I think you should have been the Sanzo instead of me."

"Better unbearably holy than completely blind to the needs of your companion." I muttered, the 'idiotic smile' completely wiped away from my face as I swing my legs over the side of the bed and begin to gather up my things. I didn't think I could stand for much more of this. I was going to lose control of my own temper soon, I could feel it, and when I did get angry, I tended to do things that I would regret later on.

"I'm not like you-"

" And I don't expect you to be." I interjected quickly, slipping into my underclothes.

"I'm not in the habit of bending over backwards to accommodate everyone else. If you're for some reason dissatisfied with me? Fine. Do whatever you want. I can't make you completely happy with me, Hakkai. I can't understand you. You won't let me, and I don't even want to try." Sanzo shrugged, holding his arms up in a gesture of surrender that would have been comical under any other situation.

"And that's the whole problem, Sanzo. You don't even try." I sighed heavily, draping my shirt over my shoulder as I pulled my pants on. This was it. I'd messed up. Whatever happened to the whole 'settling for all that I could get out of Sanzo' plan?

I guess I was becoming a little more demanding than I'd previously been. Gojyo would be pleased. He'd always been slightly annoyed by what a push over I was. I turned to face the fair-haired man scowling at me from the bed. How awkward were things going to be throughout the rest of this journey, now that I'd had it out with him? "I like you, Sanzo. I want you. Not just like this, but completely." I paused, waiting for any sort of reaction to this, but there was none. I shouldn't have expected any in the first place, I guess. I smile bitterly. "There. I've told you what I wanted. What about you? What do you want?"

I turned my back to him. He mumbled something incomprehensible, causing me to stop in my tracks as I made my way towards the door.

"I want you to stay." Came the gruff response once more, louder this time. He was staring down at the bed sheets and picking at a loose thread. He wouldn't make eye contact with me, as though he were ashamed of what he'd just admitted. It wasn't exactly a romantic pledge of undying love and devotion, or of change to accommodate me, but it would do. You had to take things one-step at a time after all.

He's arrogant, selfish and cold, but in spite of all of his shortcomings, his gruffness, his inability to open up to anyone, this was where I wanted to be, this was who I wanted to be with. I was satisfied to lie here in the dark, his arm around me as I spoke of my future plans, listening to his steady breathing and getting no response whatsoever, because now I was secure in the knowledge that he did care.

"It's a beautiful night. Don't you think so, Sanzo?"

"Shut up, Hakkai. I'm sleeping." His hand grasps mine under the covers and gives it a light squeeze.

I smile into the darkness and I do as he says, because really, sometimes, silence can say volumes more than any words possibly could, at least until Sanzo blurts out something that I'd been longing to hear for a while now.

I don't expect it to happen any time soon, he finds it so difficult to say what he truly wants to, but I can wait.

For now, I was happy.

I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's all right, all right with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside heavens door
And listen to you breathing,
Is where I want to be…

Laree
8:11 PM



Friday, October 18, 2002


Juju! *flyingtacklehuggleglomp*

Am only writing this here cos it seems as though the enetations thing doesn't work when you're using netscape...-___-

Anyways...I LOVE YOU! *hugglehuggle*

Dearie...that was so sad...Poor Ruru...I seriously loved this fic but why didn't they end up together? T___T Bad Kogure...Heehehee...

Everyone! Go to Juju's bloggy and read her ficcy! Heehee...I swear it'll make you loooove RuKo!!!
Laree
5:01 PM




Dearies...

Ne..Paspas? You okay, dearie? Why in a bad mood? *huggles*

Juju, you have to get Saiyuki. heeheehe...It comes with only the highest recommendations from me and you trust me, don't you? It has such beautiful characterizations, the guys all have incredibly tragic pasts, hence the need for them to find comfort within each other *snerk*, (Hakkai has the most tragic past, of course. The rest can't even compete with him, the poor, tragic creature...) the bishies are beautiful, if a bit on the thin side and it's funny...Heeheehee...Plus Saiyuki has some of the best songs. 'Still Time' and 'Tightrope' are seriously the catchiest ending and opening songs you'll ever hear and I love you too, dearie! *huggles* You guys always make me feel better...Ne...What Gravi DVD did you get? The OVA where there was that scene where Yuki tied Shuichi up in bed and was wearing a thong like thing? *snerk*. And yeah...I do have this strange compulsion towards male pregnancies...heeheehe...I can't help myself...it's scary...help me...heeheehee...

Fufu, I can't help feeling responsible for your whole fall out with Liete...I always seem to drag you into the stupidest things, dear.. Really, I never meant to get you into the whole thing when I complained to you about how unreasonable she was being...and she was...

Hanase, the piccy isn't a fanart...It's a scan from my goddess, Minekura-sama's artbook. Aren't they just looovely... *looks pointedly at Juju* Tenpou so does not look like a wank.......okay, maybe sometimes...but he looked fine when he was getting Li Tou Ten to give Kenren his job back, even macho... Heehehe..Oooohh that punch he gave the old bastard!...Oh damn...More proof for Tenpou x Kenren...blech...

Erjika, heeheehee...Sorry, dearie...I'm more a fan of Hakkai uke, him being so scarred from the past and all...heehee... Or 85 for that matter, cos I like 38/83...heehee... Those two together remind me sooo of RuKo... even though Chibi doesn't see the slightest similarity between the two pairings...You wouldn't happen to know where there are some Konzen x Tenpou ficcys, would you? I think I prefer the guys in their Gaiden persona...Heehehee...

Solly, Zumi and Michi, I know that you're only giving advice about this Liete matter cos really, it's pretty shitty being stuck between two sides and all. Seriously, I'm not feeling particularly fond of that girl right now after that 'wishing I didn't have much longer to live in this planet' comment or something close to that. That just pisses me off and a few other select things that she said. She doesn't have any tolerance for other people, she blows up all the time over the slightest, stupidest things, she does something one day and when someone else does what she did before, she gets all pissed off, bloody hypocrite. And she makes these bloody announcements of dissapearing from the babble or the MIRC or whatever all the time...

Seriously, I'm seriously sorry if this is affecting you guys too when it really shouldn't be. This has nothing to do with you guys and I don't see why she should let this petty little squabble that she has with me affect her relationship with you. God...What does she bloody want? Does she want me to leave IRC or something just so that she can have free rein there and over you guys? I can do that if I get really pissed off and she keeps on pressing the bloody issue but I don't feel like it right now cos most of my online friends are there...

And Solly, Pigheaded? Me? I'm only pigheaded when it comes to dealing with people like her... Seriously, it's not my nature to be petty or bitchy but if someone really pisses me off, then I get pigheaded. I'm usually a very pleasant, friendly person, contrary to some first impressions that people get of me being all snobbish and up myself whenever we first meet in RL...

Ahh...whatever...I'm just sick of the whole bloody issue...Tired of it... *goes off to poke through ficcys in ff.n*
Laree
4:41 PM



Thursday, October 17, 2002


GS Ficcy

Finished one chapter of it finally. Am gonna chapter four of my Gravi fic first before I continue this one, I think...

Title: Hakkai Takes a Break
Part: 1/?
Author: Laree McKenzie
Fandom: Gensomaden Saiyuki
Rating: PG13
Contact: lareemackie@hotmail.com
Archive: https://llmackie.tripod.com/
Warnings: This is my first attempt at a GS fic to date so the characters may be OOC. If so, then I'd appreciate it very much if you'd point out my faults and such. There will be Shounen Ai material throughout this fic (Sanzo x Hakkai/Hakkai x Sanzo. I'm a big fan of this pairing ^__^).

Part One
Division of Labor A.K.A Sanzo Fobs Off All the Work on the Two Unfortunates.

He could feel someone's hot breath against his cheek. It was annoying him, keeping him from fully enjoying the pleasant little dream he was having of a certain fair-haired monk sprawled out languidly upon a gigantic, canopied bed with red satin sheets, his pale, almost translucent skin just begging to be caressed.

The impeccable robe that denoted his rank as one of most important religious figures around slipped down one smooth, flawless shoulder and the corner of the monk's thin, firm lips were turned upwards in a come hither smile.

In his dream he saw himself stepping closer towards the bed, he watched as his hand reached out to trace the outline of those lips, those beautiful lips that were just begging to be kissed, and then-

" Hakkai?"

Cho Hakkai rolled over onto his stomach at the sound of someone calling out his name. He buried his head under a pillow and tried to pick up from where he had left off…

He sighed dreamily as the image came back to him…

Sanzo was lying in bed, his soft, silky blond hair fanning out over the pillowcase and forming a pool of dazzling gold. He was reaching out to gently touch those lips, he wanted to see if they were as soft and silky smooth as they looked, and when his fingertips finally came into contact with them, he wasn't at all disappointed. He sat himself down by the edge of the bed and leaned in towards the golden haired young man, meaning to claim those lips with his own…

" Hakkai!" The voice was more insistent this time, with a rather impatient edge to it. The pillow was pulled away from Hakkai's grasp and once more the hot breath that smelled of some sort of sweet candy intruded in his dreams. " Wake up! I'm hungry!"

There was a 'thwapping' sound as something came into contact with someone's head, then a low, menacing growl. " Leave him alone. Can't you see that he's sleeping?"

" But Sanzo! I'm hungry!" Came the pathetic, heart-rending wail that would have melted the heart of anyone else that heard it, had that person not been a rather frigid monk who was immune to any put on charms whatsoever.

" He's been driving the whole day. He cleaned out the room for us as soon as we arrived, and now you want him to cook for you?" There was a dangerous tone to Genjo Sanzo's words that clearly indicated that this rhetorical question would be best left unanswered.

Of course, Goku didn't know what a rhetorical question was. He didn't even have enough common sense in him to know when it would be the best time for him to shut up, so he opened his mouth, about to tell Sanzo that if he just gave him a bit of money, then he could go down to the inn's kitchen to buy something instead of waking up Hakkai, when Sanzo caught sight of the fourth member of their party.
His violet eyes narrowed dangerously as he watched the slim, red-haired half youkai make his way over to the cot where Hakkai lay stretched out. The half-breed then proceeded to poke at the brunette with his index finger.

" Did you not hear what I just said to the baka saru?"

" I heard, oh great and ever pious Sanzo. But if his holiness might just let me speak to Hakkai for a little while so that I can ask him where he's put my bags…"

" No!" The fan was raised, ready to come down against the thick skull of the infuriating other half of the Duo of the Destruction of Peace, when a soft, sleep befuddled voice stopped its descent.

" I'm awake. I'm awake…" Hakkai blurted out, as he pulled himself up onto a sitting position on the bed. It would have been impossible to remain sleeping anyway, what with the racket going on around him.
Better to tear himself away from his pleasant little dream than to be stuck with an injured and whining Gojyo later on. It was always the most macho men who turned out to be the worst babies when sick or hurting or suffering from a headache that came as a result of a brain jarring knock to the skull that could only be alleviated through a thirty minute temple rub.

It had been such a lovely dream! But, he supposed that waking up to see the real Sanzo would be better than any dream at any time. He slipped his monocle into place, just in time to catch the grateful look that a cringing Sha Gojyo sent his way.

Watching the exchange between the two, Sanzo made a disgruntled sound at the back of his throat and gave both Gojyo and Goku one last look of deep, and immense disgust before making his way back to the rather uncomfortable chair at one corner of their little room where he had been reading a week old local newspaper, totally unaware of the fact that he had been lounging around seductively in the green eyed man's thoughts just a few seconds before. " Ignore those two and go back to sleep." He advised the only person in his entourage who acted even vaguely like a normal adult.

" Ahh, no. Since I'm already awake, I might as well hear these two out already!" Hakkai swung his legs over the side of the cot, his smile already in its customary place. Then he turned his attention to the 'urgent' matters that his two companions were bringing to his attention.

As much as he might have liked to spend the whole afternoon watching Sanzo, these two had to be taken care of.

Which was too bad since the monk was always so adorable when reading something, those glasses of his perched precariously upon the bridge of that finely formed nose, eyebrows drawn together in a look of intense absorption and his lips moving just the slightest bit as those indescribably beautiful eyes of his roamed over the words written in the page…

" I'm hungry, Hakkai!"

" Maa, Goku. I'll go out and get us something nice to eat in a few minutes, all right?" The youngest in their group (appearance and mannerism wise anyways) beamed happily up at him and began ticking off a list of all the things that he wanted before Gojyo clamped a hand over his mouth to shut him up, and promptly let go when a set of very sharp teeth came down over the fleshy portion of his palm.

The red haired youkai retaliated with a kick to Goku's ass that sent him sprawling onto the wooden boards of the floor before turning his attention to Hakkai. " Oi, where's my bag? I'm going out to check out the girls in this place and I need a new shirt. The monkey drooled all over me when he fell asleep in the jeep."

" I don't drool! And I'm not a monkey you stupid, horny water demon!"

" I put it under your cot. And leave that shirt out where I can see it with the other dirty clothes so that I can take them out and wash them later on." Hakkai instructed him. Gojyo released Goku from the headlock that he'd put on him after the kid had started calling him a water demon, and then ignored the younger boy's verbal assault on his character as he pawed through his canvas duffle bag in search for something somewhat decent to wear.

Tuning out of the all too familiar insult hurling competition, the bespectacled man asked Sanzo;
" Anything that you'd like me to get for you when I go out? Maybe some cigarettes?"

The monk nodded curtly in response. He actually felt sort of guilty, having Hakkai running such a trivial errand for him when he already had his hands full taking care of the two idiots, but he reasoned that the guy was already going out anyways. " Enough to last 'til the next village at least."

" I need some too!" Gojyo piped in. " Sanzo's stingy when it comes to sharing his. And alcohol. Lots and lots of it."

" I want pork dumplings!" Goku supplied helpfully.

" All right, all right…" The brunette youkai said agreeably as he picked up the shopping bag that had been thrown haphazardly onto the floor of the room. He made his way towards the door and had just been about to let himself out when he heard Sanzo's low, slightly miffed words.

" You spoil them." He muttered.

Hakkai only smiled before stepping out onto the hallway of the inn.

" We need to talk." Sanzo declared as he grabbed hold onto the back of Gojyo's fresh shirt and pulled him back into the room, away from the door. " The three of us need to have a little conversation about something."

" Oi, oi! Careful with the shirt!" Gojyo managed to slip away from Sanzo with quite a bit of effort and proceeded to dust off his clothing. "The three of us can have a little conversation about that something later on. Right now, I'm heading out for a night out in town!" He declared cheerfully as he smoothed down a few errant strands of his hair and stepped forward toward the door.

Sanzo positioned himself in front of Gojyo in such a way that made it clear that he wasn't about to let him escape any time soon. Not until he was finished with him, at least. He held his pistol out before him in prominent display. " We're talking. Now. Get comfortable."

Grumbling under his breath about stupid, domineering monks who thought that having a little red chakra on their forehead meant they could basically just boss everyone around, Gojyo plopped down onto his cot, scowling. " Make it quick. And if we're having this whole group-meeting thing, shouldn't Hakkai be included? We should wait until he gets back."

" Your self serving thoughtfulness amazes me, Gojyo. But what I'm about to say concerns Hakkai so it's best if he's not around."

There was the sound of hands clapping together in glee. " He's pregnant!" Goku burst out suddenly, jumping up to his feet and grabbing hold of Sanzo's trailing sleeve. " That would explain everything! I'm going to be an uncle!"

" What the hell are you talking about? Hakkai is a guy." Gojyo pointed out, as he spoke from around the filter of the lighted cigarette that was firmly attached to the corner of his mouth. The stupidity that constantly spouted from the kid never failed to amaze him.

Goku waved this little piece of information away airily, as though it held no relevance to things whatsoever. "So? I know that. But Hakkai's been acting so weird lately! He's always so tired, and he sleeps a lot more than he used to. Plus he isn't being as nice as he usually is."

" You only think that because he doesn't cook for you all the time anymore. He probably reckons you're getting a bit too fat for your own good. And besides, it's the females that get pregnant, you idiot. Not the guys." Gojyo slumped back onto the lumpy mattress of his cot, shaking his head in disbelief.

" But that's with youkai, Gojyo. Things are probably different if you're human. And Hakkai started out human, didn't he? Ne, Sanzo. It's the human males that get pregnant right? Right?" Goku tipped his head thoughtfully to one side as he gazed speculatively up at the monk. He could just about picture Sanzo with a little bulge protruding from under his robes while in the later stages of pregnancy. He'd heard that youkai women tended to get a little snappish while carrying babies. Would Sanzo's temper get affected also if someone ever got him pregnant?

The red head rolled his eyes at the younger boy's logic." That's it. I can't stand being around someone this stupid! I'm going to get Hakkai to explain things to you later on once he gets back. The whole deal with the birds and the bees."

" What did the birds and the bees have to do to Hakkai to get him pregnant?"

" Shut up. Just shut up for a little while! This is exactly what I wanted to talk to you two about…" Sanzo said, discreetly massaging his temple with his finger tips in an effort to alleviate the headache that had been brought about by having to listen to Goku's 'Pregnant Hakkai' Theory.

" You wanted to tell us about where babies come from? I already know all about that, Sanzo, but I guess I could do with a refresher course. Especially when the one who'll be lecturing is such an expert on the subject." Gojyo smirked. This ought to be interesting. A monk, a Sanzo at that, talking about reproduction? He was going to have some fun!

If looks could kill, the half youkai would probably have been six feet underground by then as Sanzo gave him the full benefit of his patented 'Die You Annoying Cockroach Who I Wouldn't Even Spit On If You Were Running Around Me On Fire Screaming in Pain Glare'. " I was referring to the way that the two of you just leave everything for Hakkai to do." He muttered through gritted teeth.

" Well, who else do you think could explain things like this to the stupid monkey? You? The celibate monk? Or maybe you want me to pick up a girl for him so that he can gain some first hand experience? I'd be glad to go off and do that right now for you!"

Aforementioned celibate monk closed his eyes meditatively in an effort to control his rapidly rising temper. If he somehow injured these two, then Hakkai would be left with the job of patching them up, and he could already see the strain that the guy was in, being left with all the domestic chores like this as though he were some sort of housewife. It just wouldn't do to stick him with more troubles.

Sanzo carefully extracted his sleeve from Goku's grasp, dusting it off with his fingertips as though some residue of the boy's highly contagious stupidity remained where he had touched him. " When Hakkai comes back, no one is going to ask him for anything." Sanzo informed the two, his voice so low that they had to strain their ears to catch whatever it was that the fair-haired monk was telling them. " No one is going to ask him to cook for him, no one is going to bother him about mending some stupid shirt. He won't be doing any work while we remain here at this village. None at all."

" Is this because he's pregnant?"

Sanzo whipped his fan out from out of nowhere and slammed it against the head from which this infuriatingly repetitive question had originated. So much for restraint for the sake of the overworked Hakkai… " No, he isn't baka saru. And he won't ever be unless there's some sort of medical miracle in the near future. Ask me that one more time and I'll kill you."

After a bit of thought, Goku carefully rephrased his question. " Why can't Hakkai get pregnant then? Is there something wrong with him? How sad. His babies would have been pretty with pretty green eyes…"

The fair-haired man decided to ignore this question for the sake of his rapidly diminishing sanity. He had no doubt about the potential prettiness of his companion's future offspring, but that was besides the point right then. "He's tired. I'm sick of you two idiots taking advantage of him. Asking him to cook for you, find your things for you-"

" Buy cigarettes for you…" Gojyo contributed helpfully, turning exaggeratedly wide, wine colored eyes towards Sanzo's in a look that was meant to be 'innocent', the monk guessed, but which only succeeded in unsettling him.

" That's different. He volunteered."

The water demon shrugged. " Well, he volunteered to get up and tell me where my bag was, so don't go all ballistic on me and getting weird ideas in that pretty, saintly head of yours. It's not healthy, plus it's not very attractive for pretty boys like you to actually think. You're just meant to be quiet and look nice. Besides, Hakkai likes helping us. It makes him happy. Why should I deprive Hakkai of the pleasure that waiting on me brings him?"

" That's the stupidest thing that I've ever heard in all my life, coming from one of the stupidest idiots that I've ever met. There's not going to be any more discussion. I've made up my mind and that's that." Sanzo crossed his arms before his chest. He let his gaze travel from Gojyo to Goku, daring them to speak up against his decision. "Gojyo, you're going to be in charge of the cooking and Goku can take care of all of the cleaning. You can both help with washing the clothes."

"Me? Cook?" The half youkai blurted out without thinking, as he was wont to do, his outrage evident. He hadn't had to cook anything since the day that Hakkai had come to live with him, and that arrangement had suited him just fine.

Why did he have to cook when there was Hakkai, the kitchen whiz, around? It made no sense. Not unless Sanzo had some strange liking for tasteless stew and lumps of meat that resembled, and tasted like, chunks of charcoal.

"I know you can."

" Well…yeah…" The redhead admitted grudgingly, " but not as well as Hakkai!"

Sanzo shrugged, seemingly unperturbed. Inwardly though, he was wondering if this was such a good idea after all. He'd tasted the guy's cooking before in the early stages of their journey when they had attempted to rotate the cooking duty, and that hadn't been much of an experience. All he remembered of the one time that Gojyo had been the one to cook their dinner was a sleepless, pain filled night where he had dashed off to the more secluded part of their camp every few minutes to relieve his aching stomach.

Still, he couldn't just take back what he'd said. If there was one thing that he hated, it was appearing wrong about something. "We'll live…" he added under his breath, so that the two wouldn't hear, " I hope…"

Gojyo was about to protest this assignment one last, futile time when a thought struck him. Everyone knew that Sanzo, in spite of the fact that he was supposed to be all holy and pure and monkish, had about as much patience when it came to things that were pissing him off as Goku waiting for his next meal. Feed him enough half burned food and he was sure to back down and happily, or at least as happily as Sanzo could ever do anything, return Hakkai to his old duties.

The half youkai smirked, mentally patting himself on the back for being such a sexy, devilishly devious cad.

Sanzo shook his head, having noticed the glazed over wine red eyes of Gojyo's as he thought over his little plan. The idiot was so transparent. And he wondered how someone as good at gauging people's emotions and thoughts like Hakkai could consistently beat him at card games. He was surrounded by idiots! " I know what you're thinking about. Don't even try it. You make any inedible stuff and I'll personally shove them down your throat. I'm not about to waste supply money on burnt stuff that we can't eat just because you're so damn lazy that you can't even spare a few moments to get something decent together."

" Why can't Goku do it? And in the first place, why do we have to do this at all? Everything's fine the way that they are now!"

" Yes, for you two idiots. Not for Hakkai. He's overworked, like me." Sanzo ignored the derisive snort from Gojyo at that comment. It took a lot of effort to be able to deliver the right sort of backhand slap with that fan of his and he had to smack those two idiots countless of times a day! No wonder his arms were so toned. " And Goku can't do the cooking because anything he makes ends up tasting like pigswill or even worse than pigswill.

"Then he'll be the only one eating the stuff because he's the only one with the stomach strong enough for that kind of garbage. And why do you have to do this? Because I'm the leader here and what I say goes. No need for explanations, no complaining. You just do what I tell you to do unless you want to die. And you will die if you don't do this. Believe me. I'm very tired, I'm in need for some shooting practice and my hand is just itching to pull the trigger on some stupid youkai, or half youkai or whatever, that gets me angry."

" And what are you supposed to be doing while we take care of all the stuff here, oh great and venerable Sanzo?" Gojyo had a feeling that he wouldn't like the monk's answer. He never seemed to like any ideas that Sanzo came up with. He liked said ideas even less when that cold, chilling smile pulled the corners of Sanzo's lips upwards, like right then.

" I'm going to be supervising. You two idiots need someone to make sure that you're doing things the right way…"

By then, Gojyo was far too anxious to get out of there to argue. He was sure that Hakkai wouldn't go for such a half-baked scheme anyway. Hakkai was a perfectionist; he wouldn't let them do everything by themselves because he'd know that they'd most probably mess something up.

Sanzo knew this, so why the hell was he upsetting the whole scheme of things and making him actually do the housework?

That was sweet, mild mannered, ever-helpful Hakkai's job! Why, if Gojyo didn't know Sanzo any better, he'd have thought that Mr. Frigid Monk was trying to sweeten Hakkai up so that he could get in his pants!

But that, of course, was impossible. Sanzo was a twenty two year old monk who'd been celibate all his life, hence the meanness borne out of pent up sexual frustration. He wouldn't make a move on Hakkai!

Of course, had he been thinking properly then, he'd have realized that twenty two years of celibacy would have been even more reason to do so, but this was Gojyo. The only thing that concerned him right then was getting the horny, frigid monk off his back so that he could get some action out on the town.

~**~ To Be Continued ~**~
Laree
7:28 AM




The Wicked Bitch of OZ remains alive and well! And comes with a new bloggy layout!

Ahhh...Poor Hakkai. Used and then discarded. Anyways, he had a good run and, he's still sorta in the layout, only as his former self. Behold the heavenly, napping bishies of the Gaiden: Kenren, Tenpou (beloved!!!), Konzen and an incredibly kawaii Goku! Ahhh... Konzen and Tenten look sooo good together!!! And people insist that there's more basis for GojHak or KenTen in the series...*shakes head disbelievingly*.

Anyways, I hope you guys are seeing this all right cos I can't check myself. I'm using Netscape right now cos somethings gone wrong with my IE, dammit, so I can't see my blog properly cos my browser apparently doesn't support CSS.

It was my one month anniversary with Migs yesterday and we went out and had a great time and he definitely has more sense when it comes to picking gifts than he who shall not be named because really I don't know if I'm over that stupid bastard yet. Yeah...something to think about as I laze around the apartment idly flipping through the channels on t.v for any Chinese bishies that I may encounter and fall in love with... Anyways, I forgot to get Migs a present cos I thought that that was like...next week still, so now I have to get him something real nice which means that I'll have to put off buying that really, really, really gorgous coat that I saw til next week...then again I don't really need a coat right now so I reckon that'll be fine...

Actually...I thought that we'd been going out for a lot longer than a month... I really did...Weird. Heeheehee...Time flies when you're having fun, right? Anyways, he's really a decent guy and I like him a lot and hopefully nothing untoward will happen until my eighteenth birthday party so he'll be there as my date...heehehee...

Fufu...I'm sorry if I caused any friction between you and Liete...that really wasn't my intention... You know me, dear... when I get pissed, I just go running my mouth off because it's what I'm accustomed to doing, and I'm sorry if I put you into a tight spot and dragged you into things...

Ehehe...Juju...me sorry too, ne...seriously...see...no heeheehees or smiley faces or anything...just an inordinate amount of ellipses because I tend to use a lot of them when I'm typing slowly and thinking in little spurts as I write...

Dear, really. I'm sorry if I keep on obsessing about topics that don't interest you...that's just part of my personality, you know? I'm a very, very obsessive person. Once I've gotten hold of an idea or whatever in my head, I just blab and blab and blab... (take my ex as an example. I had a very, very unhealthy preoccupation with him...) and I know I'm rather self-centered and all and sometimes I do give the impression of acting like the centre of the universe...that's purely out of habit and I'll try to control it and everything...And I can't tell you how many times people have called me a bitch or whatever because of that because I do have the rather unfortunate habit of usually thinking only about myself and so on and so forth...

I'm a bit of a spoilt brat, I must admit...I'm used to getting things my way and being listened to all the time because I happen to be the only girl and my brothers were so much older than me and I'm the youngest and all so blame my parents...heeheehee...but I know that it's not excuse...

... and it's just so difficult for me right now... I've made such a lot of bad choices that I'm beginning to regret now such as sitting out for another semester because I really find myself missing college right now...all my friends are at school and they seem to have changed...they're getting on with things, have seemed to have grown out of all the childish things that we got up to and I'm still the same...I'm not getting anywhere with my life, I don't seem to have any ambitions or goals or anything so when I come online and speak to all of you guys, I tend to just let it all out you know..and be loud and all... because right now, most of the time, it seems to me as though my RL friends are just way too busy to be bothered with me, Mel lives in the same apartment but at the moment, we're not really getting on that well with each other and Migs is real nice, I really, really like him but I can't spend as much time with him as I'd like and I still seem to have this thing for Matt...

Anyways...I'm too depressed right now to bother saying anything about Liete and the whole matter...suffice it to say that I was somewhat amused by the clever little Wicked Bitch of OZ comment...but I'm still pissed. Will perhaps blog more tomorrow when I'm more cheerful...And god...I was soo happy yesterday...
Laree
1:19 AM